Do you say YES when you really mean NO? Feeling Comfortable with your Date

Are you the type of person who says Yes when you want to say No? You are not alone. There are many men and woman who do that. Relationship Expert Debbie Lamedman talks about feeling comfortable with a dating partner in this Guest Post.

Have you ever known a person who says yes to everything, even when he or she doesn’t really mean yes? I have known this person and actually, to be honest, I have been this person. I see it happen to a lot of people who use dating services as a means to meet and date people outside of their social circle. They say yes to things they don’t want to do when they mean no in an effort to get someone to like them. Obviously, it’s not a great tactic to employ and it shows a certain amount of low self-esteem. But many of us are guilty of it because we really want our date to like us.

Interestingly enough, if you want to feel comfortable with your dating services partner, there really is no need to be someone you’re not. You are at your most attractive when you are being true to yourself. Think about this in terms of people who you’ve been attracted to in the past. Aren’t they exciting and attractive to be around when they are being their most confident self? Of course they are, and so are you. If tension and awkwardness surrounds your relationship, you need to question whether or not the two of you are suited to one another. You may not feel comfortable with this person, because he or she is not the right one for you. Don’t immediately jump to the conclusion that you are doing something wrong.

Obviously people feel comfortable with one another when they share mutual interests, and when there is mutual respect and trust. There’s nothing more rewarding and fulfilling than being with someone who lets you be your authentic self. If you find yourself dating someone who is always quick to judge you, who is always telling you that you are wrong or undermining your opinion, of course you’re going to feel uncomfortable with that person. Why would you want to waste your time with someone who didn’t appreciate you for who you are.

No one is perfect and we all make mistakes. If you and your partner are going to feel comfortable with one another, you need to give each other breathing room and allow for slip-ups from time to time. We all make them, but if we are able to learn from our mistakes, we’re the better for it. So obviously, you want to find someone who is kind and understanding and can help you to be your best self. As you engage with the many dates you will meet online, be kind to yourself by choosing the company of people who will treat you right. Life is too short, so don’t spend your time on a date with someone who doesn’t make you feel comfortable at ease.

About the Author: Debbie Lamedman is highly sought after for dating advice by her friends and strangers alike! Find more of her articles at her blog, Dating Services!
Image Credit : mikebaird @ flickr