Compatibility Dating Site Quizzes-Do These Tests Help Your Aim or Miss Their Mark?

We’ve all seen those ever popular dating site advertisements that claim their compatibility test will match you with your perfect soul mate, but do these tests really work? Let’s put it this way, these types of cupid love calculators only help give us insight into whether it’s a good idea to fall in love with a specific person. They can’t predict actual outcomes of chemical responses to love or emotional bonds that could be established with a prospective match. While they are not miracle workers, compatibility match tests do have their advantages.

They may sound like just a gimmick, but some of them can help us learn more about ourselves and what we are looking for in a partner. By laying your wants and needs out in answering a few simple questions, you gain a better understanding of what your deal breakers are in a relationship. Just like your ever important shopping list, you can check off the things you really need to have to create the perfect recipe for love.

This means you only have to put your ideal matches into your dating site grocery cart and you don’t have to worry that you’ve overfilled it with needless items cluttering up your relationship cupboard. Compatibility tests are just one piece of the puzzle, but they do help you get one step closer to putting the big picture together by focusing and streamlining your goals for finding a partner.

If you have an open mind and take these tests seriously, you can minimize the outcome of incorrect results. Using scientific methods to find love never hurt anyone. By using these compatibility formulas you can add to your arsenal of love arrows and help them in finding their mark. It’s all about perception and judgment of yourself and what you believe is good for you in developing a healthy and fruitful relationship.

If you don’t have time to dedicate to filling out a form, then you don’t have time to establish a love match. We all know that using specific criteria information by itself will not help you find true love, but it may just open the door to many more possibilities and future connections that are tailored just for you. Think of these tests as a love Einstein GPS, calculating your guide route to better matches and a higher rate of success in finding your way through the dating site jungle.

About the Author:

Tiersa writes for datingsite.org and onlinedatingsites.net and enjoys writing about today's modern dating dilemmas and the unseen quirky side of relationships and dating sites. We provide relationship advice, tips and reviews on the 25 top dating sites.

Saying the 3 Little Words I Love You

                                                                  Photo Credit: istockphoto.com

Those three little words we are all aching to hear from our partner are said a lot. You know the words I’m talking about. “I love you.” People say it all the time to one another.  But often times, they are said automatically, mechanically, and when that happens it lessens their meaning. If you are in a relationship and you have said those words to your partner and he hasn’t said them back, it can be embarrassing, awkward and painful. No one wants to be in a one-sided relationship, so when we tell our partners we love them, we hope to hear it back. We want them to love us too. Who wouldn’t?

As a big Seinfeld fan, I remember the episode when George tells Jerry he wants to let the woman he’s currently dating know that he loves her. Jerry tells George that saying “I love you,” to a woman is risky. It’s a big matzoh ball floating out there, and if she doesn’t say it back, it can be quite a blow. This is definitely true. If you are in the beginning stages of a new relationship, you don’t want to say the words too soon. Some men and women, have trouble accepting words of endearment, especially in a new relationship. Saying “I love you” too soon can sometimes backfire if the other person’s feelings don’t quite match yours.

A friend of mine has been in her current relationship for just under a year. She and her boyfriend met on a dating site, began a brief long distance relationship, and eventually she moved to his city to start a new job and of course to be with him. They make a very good couple and things between them seem to be moving along very well. However, she felt like she was falling in love with him, and when she told him, all he said was, “wow.” And he didn’t respond with anything more than that. Obviously, she was upset, but she also realized that he just wasn’t emotionally at the same level as she was.

She backed off, and their relationship continued to grow and evolve. It is often said that actions speak louder than words, and though my friend’s boyfriend would never say he loved her, it was apparent how he felt by how he treated her. Very lovingly. But still…we need to hear it. One Sunday afternoon, they were spending the day together, and he quietly told her that he loved her. “I love you,” he said. Simply. No-nonsense. He was finally able to acknowledge his feelings and verbalize them. Because she waited and never pushed him, those words meant so much to her. He wasn’t saying them because he felt he had to or because it was an automatic response. He was saying them because that’s how he felt.

Words don’t mean anything if there isn’t action behind them. So if you’re not quite ready to say things you don’t feel or don’t mean, you should wait. And if someone you care for isn’t saying them to you, just know they aren’t ready yet. But one day they will be, and it will mean so much more if you wait for it.

About the Author : This is a Guest Post from Debbie Lamedman who is a playwright and freelance writer who writes about online dating and relationships. Among some of the websites Debbie writes for is DatingSite.org. She also has a personal blog at Confessions of a Cluttered Mind.

Keeping Your Relationship Strong

Photo by Mike Baird

Should relationships be hard? In a word, yes! Relationships are hard. Anything worth having is worth fighting for, don’t you think? And yes, negotiating the sometimes stormy waters of a relationship can definitely be difficult from time to time. But the difficult times should not be constant, and the relationship itself shouldn’t feel like work. If it does, perhaps you need to redefine what the two of you are looking for. How to keep your relationship strong?

It’s natural for two people in a relationship to not see eye-to-eye on everything. And that’s okay. You don’t have to agree upon everything. It actually keeps things within the relationship interesting and lively if you each have your own individual interests. But ultimately, if you want to keep the relationship moving forward, compromise and communication are the two most essential elements needed to keep your relationship sailing smoothly.

There are plenty of couples out there who have knock-down, dragged out fights, and they are completely and totally in love with each other. Fighting works for them. Other couples cannot weather a simple disagreement and break up when contention rises between them. Each couple is different and you and your partner need to find your own way for what works for you. You can read all the relationship books in the world, and many offer very helpful tools and tips to making your relationship work. But in the end, it comes down to what each of you want separately from the relationship along with what you want as a couple.

You and your own partner are on your own timetable. Don’t let anyone else dictate to you where you should be at three, six or twelve months in. You will be exactly where you are supposed to be. Two people and two people only are steering this ship—you and your partner. If you try to rush things before either one of you are ready, you are headed toward rocky territory. One of the biggest problems some couples face is getting too many opinions from their friends and family as to how to work out the difficult issues that arise. Work those issues out together—between the two of you. Getting multiple opinions from people outside the relationship will only serve to confuse things between you and your partner.

Obviously, if things have gotten out-of-hand and you’re hoping to salvage the relationship, you may consider seeing a professional counselor who can help the two of you work things out. But try to avoid involving friends or family which will only complicate matters. A professional relationship therapist is an impartial third party who will give be able to shed some perspective on the relationship and hopefully help you work out the issues which are causing difficulties between the two of you.

As previously stated, relationships are hard, and you need to stay committed and focused if you want your relationship to go the distance and succeed. But it shouldn’t be torture to be in a relationship. It should be fun and rewarding, enjoyable and loving. One suggested formula that seems to work as far as gauging the success of your relationship says if you are 100 percent happy with your relationship 50 percent of the time, you’re doing great. So learn to work things out, pick your battles and be sure to enjoy each other. Life is so much better when you can share it with someone you love.

About the Author: This is a Guest Post from Debbie Lamedman, a playwright and freelance writer. She currently contributes to various websites where she writes about relationships, online dating and dating services.

What you Learn about a Partner when things go Wrong

Sometimes life does not go as planned. Every so often we all get flat tires, delayed by train strikes, leaks in the roof, and unexpected illnesses. There are thousands of things that can go wrong in our day to day lives and it’s only natural that sometimes they do just that- usually at the worst possible time.

As we grow up and become adults we learn to deal with the times when it all goes wrong. This is part of growing up and becoming independent. It’s one thing to cope on your own when life is proceeding according to plan and another thing entirely when it takes an unexpected turn for the worse, in whatever way. By the time we reach adulthood everyone has their own ways of dealing with minor crises and major catastrophes.

Not all those ways are equal. Consider the flat tire. Some people will sigh and get on with fixing it as best they can. Some will be more prepared than others, knowing that they have a spare in good working order and all the necessary tools. Some will call for roadside assistance to help them, even if it means waiting for hours. That could be because they don’t know how to change a tire or because they don’t like getting their hands dirty. Some people will lose their temper and have a good tantrum before doing anything.

You probably have a good idea what you’d do under the circumstances (even if you’re not willing to admit it out loud). What you might not know is how your new partner would react. Stress rubs us raw and brings out what’s underneath- frustration, insecurity, unhappiness or just maybe, reserves of patience and strength.

There is no way of knowing how someone will react when things go wrong, until they go wrong. Now I’m not saying you should look for an opportunity to cause some chaos or welcome it when it arrives of its own accord- as it certainly will sooner or later- but seeing a potential long term partner reacting to difficult circumstances gives you information about who they are and where their strengths and weaknesses lie. After the rough patch is over have a think about how both of you reacted. Did you work together to solve the problem? Was he or she supportive, and could you be supportive back? Did he or she stay calm under pressure and keep their temper in check?

If the answer to all those questions is a ‘yes’, you might have a keeper. If they had a yelling, screaming tantrum over something you consider small and fixable like a flat tire, bear in mind that may be their coping strategy for more significant problems too. If you felt you couldn’t cope with a major disaster and they were there for you, that’s a huge plus. If they weren’t emotionally available when you needed them to be this time, the chances are that they won’t be in the future.

We can learn a lot when things go wrong, about how to cope better next time and what’s really important in life, but also about the people we’re with when it all goes pear shaped. Staying calm in a crisis is an incredibly valuable characteristic in a partner. If you can work through day to day problems together you’ll have a much better chance of standing up to the big stuff hand in hand.

About the Author : Jess Spate works as a sustainable business consultant for a number of companies making and selling everything from garden fountains to down jackets. She lives in Cardiff, UK, and writes non-fiction in her spare time.

Romancing a Loved one with Custom Jewelry

Jewelery is inextricably linked with romance. As a gift, jewels have always meant something special and personal. Giving someone a beautiful thing is about as romantic as you can get. Special rings and custom made jewelery are also important gifts, meaning the relationship has moved to another level. With modern technology and a new generation of jewelers, romance has also taken on a new lease of life in customized jewels, and some are pretty spectacular. 

Jewels, Meanings and Romance

Custom jewelery is ideal for the truly special gift. A custom design can refer to an event or shared experience, something that only the giver and recipient understand. The custom jewelery commemorates that secret moment or deep shared personal event. This is really a lovers code, incomprehensible to others, which makes it even more fun.For a really romantic gift, there are almost no limits. The most beautiful graphic designs can be turned into jewelery with the help of a skilled jeweler. 

Custom made Jewelery, Basics

Custom made jewelry is jewelry made to your specifications. It’s also a good excuse for jewelers, who are trained in design as part of their fundamental skills, to show what they can do. This is how custom jewelry is made:

Custom made jewelery is based on a special design concept.

You meet with the jeweler, and explain your idea. (Bring a visual design, if you have one, to help explain what you want. The more specific you are, the better, and the jeweler will be able to reproduce your design more efficiently.)

The jeweler costs the materials and labor, and gives you a quote and time frame. (Note: Complex designs really can take a lot of time. Jewelers may have to work with gems and other materials which have to be cut and shaped very precisely. For things like diamond rings, a fitting may be required.)

If you OK the quote, the jeweler will make the design as specified.

Jewelery design concepts
 
The more thought and planning you put into your design idea, the better the result is likely to be. Many jewelery designs include a range of issues:

Precious metals: Do you want gold, platinum, white gold or another metal as the base of your design?
Gems: What are your preferred gemstones and color schemes? 

Matching pieces: Do you want matching pieces, like a ring and a necklace with the same design, or perhaps a brooch? (This approach can include a piece containing the design in clear perspective, and matching pieces having the design in miniature.)
Inscriptions: A statement, a single word, or a name are common inscriptions. The rule of thumb is that you can have whatever you can fit on the metal. Anything is possible, if the jeweler says it can be done.
 
A Truly Romantic Gift

The result will be a unique gift, unlike anything else in the world. That’s one of the reasons custom jewelery is so romantic. It’s a special thing between two people. It really is better to give than to receive.

What are you hiding beneath your Shapewear Undergarments?

Physical Appearance plays an important part when it comes to building relationships which is one of the reasons for the popularity of Shapewear undergarments which can help one look shapely, slimmer and hide imperfections on the body. It is not only Celebrities who use slimming undergarments to look picture perfect but also ordinary individuals to hide a fatty belly and increased size of waist because they are affordable.

The Shapewear undergarments can help one look at least 2 sizes slimmer instantly by putting the curves back to where they belong thereby helping one to be more confident about their looks. For women especially this underwear helps to eliminate bra bulges, sagging skin, bulging tummy and visible panty lines which look ugly especially when you wear tight fitting clothes. So these are definitely a blessing to woman who wants to look good. But, are these slimming undergarments a permanent solution? It is definitely not. Shapewear Undergarments may be a quick body slimming solution but there is no way one can compare a healthy body and skin which is the result of a healthy diet and exercising.

However, Looks are not everything when it comes to building relationships. The overall personality of an individual depends a lot on his or her belief and confidence level. This is where the Power of the subconscious mind can be of great help because the body portrays the working of the mind. It is a proven fact that the subconscious can heal malignancy of the skin and also control all the functions of the body. As someone who has used the subconscious mind to achieve goals I can vouch that it works. For those who have no idea on how to utilize the power of the subconscious mind I would highly recommend 'The Power of your subconscious mind' by Dr Joseph Murphy which is one of the most powerful self help guides ever written on this subject. By putting the techniques which you learn from the book into practice one would be able to build harmonious friendships, improve marital bonds, conquer bad habits, acquire wealth and much more.

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Three Epic Fail Romances from the Movies

Guest Post from David

Are you clueless about love and dating but know your movies like no one else’s business?  Do you have stacks of DVDs and Blu-Rays and spend just as much time on Netflix as you do on E-Harmony?  Maybe it’s time you learned a few things from the movies, like these epic fail romances.  Hey, there’s a reason we enjoy watching other people make fools of themselves in the name of love.  So we don’t have to make the same mistakes.

500 Days of Summer : There’s nothing quite like romance in retrospect.  Who can watch Joseph Gordon-Levitt fall madly in love with a girl who obviously doesn’t respect him or like him that much? This is a great film and an epic fail of a romance that reminds guys never to invest more in a relationship than you’re getting back. Sometimes the happy ending (even in the story of your own life) is internal. Your happy ending is to get over someone who is bad news for you, and then use your passion and energy to find someone who really deserves you.

Manhattan : Woody Allen’s fawning over Mariel Hemingway (a barely legal woman at the time) was creepy on so many levels. However, it was also the embodiment of an unstable May-December relationship. He was unable to commit himself to a young woman he couldn’t fully trust, because of all sorts of social issues, body image issues and paranoia.  He chased his replacement daughter away and broke her heart, only to go crawling back to her after he was dumped by a woman his own age.  This is not so much a movie against older-younger relationships as it is a movie that warns you against pursuing doomed romances that you know will fail—and yet try anyway. If you see warning signs all over the place then what makes you think you can defy the odds?  The thirst for love can move people to do stupid things.  Have the strength to evaluate your prospects and say no to a relationship if you can tell it’s going to cause heartache in the end.

Knocked Up : Knocked Up may be a funny movie, but it’s hardly a romantic date movie. This is a two-hour horror film on what could happen if you score on the first date and a terrible accident occurs. If you’re lucky, you end up really liking the guy or girl you’re forced to marry and really enjoy raising an instant family. Of course, there’s also the chance that you’ll hate each other but still have to pay mom child support. This is not quite a tragic love story, but I think having a child conceived after the first date and then being chained to a person you may or may not like for the rest of your life is an epic fail of a situation. Apparently though, Seth Rogan’s character had such low-self esteem he was grateful to have any woman interested in him.  That’s what you call an “epic save.” Guys and girls: it usually doesn’t work this way in real life.  Always use protection and think things through before you make that extra-suave move.

Up in the Air : Forget about the spiritual journey George Clooney’s character “Ryan” went through—what about the epic fail he had in romancing Natalie?  Though not truly about online dating, this movie does manage to show the inherent risks you take when you date someone “out of town.” When you chat online, you are meeting people in a worldwide “virtual bar” where many can come together, but few people can actually leave together.  When you both happen to be in one place at the same time, fireworks can start.  However, settling back down to reality and finding out that your partner is not ready to make a leap of faith can be disheartening. This is why many online singles limit themselves to local partners (not to mention unattached partners!).Because they want love to happen in the real world and not in fantasy land.

Learn from these epic romance failures and avoid situations that will only bring trouble. Stick to the fairy tale princes and princesses and find your happy ending!

About the Author : This post was written by David who consults to a dating company that reviews the Top 10 Dating Websites and provides comparison features.

How to Avoid the On-Again-Off-Again Relationship Cycle

As a lesbian that has been in a monogamous relationship for the past four years, I want to bring up an issue that I’ve found to be disheartening and problematic: people that get stuck in this “on-again-off-again” relationship cycle. This happens to all types of relationships, but it seems as though this issue affects a LOT of lesbians. In addition, to being a huge bummer when “couple friends” of ours are having problems or breaking up, because we never want to see that, it also tends to leave my wife and I with far less to people to get together with. When the couple splits, usually both sides want to tell their story. We have taken a strictly neutral stance in those situations where we will listen but not take sides with either friend. I think because we don’t take a side, we are somewhat forgotten about by both sides and end up with less close friends altogether. I want to examine the cause these sorts of relationships. Why do people get stuck in these cycles of breaking up and getting back together? Why does this seem to be more prominent in the lesbian community? How can this be avoided?

I’ve read that people get stuck in these cycles for many different reasons. Sometimes everything is great except for one very important disagreement. Sometimes there is one great thing among several aspects that don’t work. The relationship could be unbalanced somehow or one person may be using the other. As with several cases that I have witnessed, one person isn’t sure what they want and keeps changing their mind. My first assumption about why lesbians tend to have this issue more frequently is that lesbian relationships contain far more emotion and drama than most. Women are typically thought of as letting their emotions play a big role in their lives. I’m not saying this is a bad thing; I myself am a woman. The problem, I think, is that the emotion is doubled in lesbian relationships. Doubled emotion means doubled drama and I can see how that can lead to an explosive situation when it comes to arguments or fights. Essentially, these women are breaking up at every argument over who-knows-what.

But why get back together? I think this, too, is the nature of women. We tend to want to be with another person. There is an innate desire to be close to someone and when we wake up or sober up the next day and realize we are alone, it doesn’t go over well. Being with that person was comforting and comfortable and so, they get back together. I have seen this happen many times and would like to offer some advice.

I know it is cliché but communication is the key in any relationship. Being open and honest about your feelings is a must. If you cannot do this with your partner then you are going to have a problem. Good communication for the most part will prevent major arguments from happening in the first place. Talk about what you want and where you see the relationship going. If you are both under the understanding that you are in it for the long run, arguments can happen without breaking up. If you have already broken up and want to get back together with an ex, take a break before doing this. A break from the relationship can give each person time to think and decide if getting back together is really the best option. On a break you are both still open for the chance to get back together so the panic of being alone isn’t enough to drive you back without considering the whole picture. Think long and hard about getting back together. I know it is lonely without them and you feel you have made a mistake but make sure to resolve the original issue before going back to them. If you broke up because they were too jealous or dishonest or whatever it may be, consider that this probably will not change and the cycle will continue. Do you want a few weeks of unhappiness to get over a break up or several wasted months or years of unhappiness being in this on-again-off-again cycle?

This is a Guest Post from Mandi Titus. She is a Blogger, Guest Blogger and Freelance Writer. She currently lives in New Smyrna Beach, FL and works in Public Relations for a large private health care organization. She maintains two blogs of her own @ Vermont and Mandi Munches and can be reached at mandititus@gmail.com You can also follow her on Twitter @ATVermont.

Bringing Up The Topic Of Marriage Counseling to Spouse

Speaking in all honesty, nobody can really say that the idea of receiving marriage counseling is something to rave and brag about. Unfortunately, we sometimes get twisted up in our ideas of what right and wrong are. Take just a few seconds to think about why marriage counseling seems like something that you would not want to do. The chances are very high that your reasoning is that you do not want others to form a certain impression of you. Take another moment and ask if living up to the demands of others is really worth risking your relationship?

So what it your answer? We both know that you want your marriage to work, and if counseling is an option that appears to be appealing to you, why not give it a shot? It is not worth ignoring and avoiding simply because you feel that it might look weird to other people. Who cares? You did not care what people thought about you and your spouse when you first fell in love, why care when you are doing something that will improve that relationship?

Now how exactly do you go about actually bringing up marriage counseling with your loved one? Truth be told, there is always going to be that awkward feeling regardless of how much you "prepare" for it. On the positive side however, things are much smoother and easier once you actually go through it. Use your better judgement when deciding on when and where to bring up the discussion, and handle it as professionally as possible.

Explain to your partner that you have given some serious thought and consideration to your current situation, and you have decided that marriage counseling may be an ideal way to improve your relationship and iron out some of the rougher spots in both of your lives. Remember that you both love each other and want to make your relationship work, it is just that you are facing obstacles that are not common enough to know how to fix. A marriage counselor has training and experience in identifying and explaining how to solve these problems.

Allow your partner the time and space needed to think over the possibility of seeking out professional help for the relationship issues you are experiencing. If your partner has also been thinking about the same thing even before you brought it up, then they will most likely be willing. If not, reiterate the fact that you are both experiencing a new problem and should seek out third party help to fix it for the sake of your relationship.
In either case, things will proceed smoothly 99.9 % of the time. If you should be in the remaining 0.1%, then it may be time to evaluate your relationship with a different perspective. I wish you the best and hope that things work out for the better of your relationship.

Do you have your own story regarding relationship counseling? Please share and discuss below.


This is a Guest Post from Sabas Chapa. He is a freelance writer and an internet marketing coach. His is currently building a website that explains how to use an electric knife sharpener to make cooking easier.

The Need to Fulfil Yourself by Travelling Alone!

Something that has plagued many relationships is the need to do something that you have always wanted to. Now things like this are your dreams, something that as individuals we want to undertake alone. There in lies a problem, I have seen many people break up in pursuit of their own dreams, where one person wanted to go traveling around the world. The main problem is that people fall in love, before they have managed to live out their dreams.

So you fall in love with the woman or man of your dreams, then around four or six years down the line you decide that you need to explore yourself and travel around India and China. You are expecting to be out of the country for about four to five months and you explain to your partner that this is something you “need to do”. What sort of response do you expect from this, well its probably not going to be the top result, and you may find yourself at the end of a very sharp point.

Love, or at least falling in love isn’t really something that you can just put on hold, so when it happens you jump at the situation (some of us may wait a while, but inevitably you try your luck). Now because we have embarked on this mission of love we neglect to think about ourselves and what are ambitions are for a while, until a certain amount of time down the line.

So after you have explained this and you are faced with the somewhat scary looking face of your partner where do you take the conversation now? Waiting for all the possible screaming and shouting to stop may be a good place to start, do not interrupt allow all of that anger to vent. Then after the volcano has finished erupting and has mellowed to a constant but less aggressive lava flow, begin to talk. Explain that this is what you have wanted, and that however much you wanted to mention it when you got together you were afraid of it pushing them away. The seeking pity part over then come up with a compromise. Someone once said to me that “relationships are built on compromise”, not always true in my opinion but it does have some leverage.

Instead of making this seem all about you, invite your partner to join you, this will probably not go down very well, but it will lead nicely onto the next part. Explain that if they cannot join you immediately ask them to come out and meet you half way. Tell them that your feelings for them are ever growing but so are you, this is the time for you both to do something outrageous and exciting, a little adventure before settling down to the perfect life (this should win some brownie points). Next make a nice cuppa, offer to take out to dinner to discuss further, what ever you do, don’t walk away from the situation if it gets too heated, you will never be forgiven.

This isn’t a guide on how to worm your way out of this sort of situation, just a helpful reminder that you don’t have to break up to go along with your dreams. It worked for me, why not you!

This is a guest post by Mark. He travels around the world, working for a Maldives holidays tour operator, sharing his own experiences is a great passion of his!

Divorce of a Generation

No one gets married with the expectation that they will divorce. While overall divorce rates continue to drop, young marriage divorce rates are increasing.  For the fourth straight year, the 20-something demographic had the highest rate of divorce out of any other age group. There’s even a name for it – the “Starter Marriage.”

There is a trend of dismisiveness. High profile marriages of celebrities and their own dismissive attitudes contribute to the whole, certainly. Anyone, including those young twenty somethings, will come through divorce with scars. They represent the consequences of a young marriage ending. They carry that baggage throughout their life and future relationships. If there are children in the relationship, they now have to face single parenthood (as well as attempting to be role models for healthy relationships.) The social stigma of divorce has dissipated, but many of the young divorcees are reporting feeling shame.  Civitas, a think tank, took a survey that gauged young people’s attitudes and ideas towards marriage. They found that 76% of those aged 20 to 24 were strongly in favor of marriage.  Part of the pull of marriage is the fact that these people are a product of divorce. They idealize what could have been, but also see divorce as a way out, also exampled for them. Wanting to do things different than your parents could be a good thing, but it is not a reason to get married and it is not the way to stay married.  It sets a couple up for failed expectations, exacerbated by celebrity marriages, divorces, and attitudes.

When the parents and grandparents of these 20-somethings got married and created families, they had vast familial and societal networks. They had the support necessary to build relationships and sustain them. There was life experience in those networks, along with examples of what worked and didn’t.  Today, society is more fragmented, and those examples just aren’t there. What’s the answer?  Many of these 20-somethings just don’t have enough life experience to know what they want, much less how to sustain a we. Some young marriages do stay together, so that is only a part of the problem.  Certainly one answer would be premarital and marital counseling. That could take up where the lack societal examples leave off. Another solution may be a break period before a divorce can happen. Perhaps jumping into divorce is the problem and a cooling off period would be a relationship saver.

The truth is relationships and marriage are hard work. We need to teach the current (and future) generations how to do the work.

This is a Guest Post from Sarah Harris.Her Wedding Planning Advice is a blog for brides that helps them stress less and enjoy the planning process. If you are looking for the perfect wedding dress, or if you need advice on how to plan a bachelorette party, Wedding Planning Advice has you covered.

Relationship Experts Advice for Issues

I am no relationship expert. My experience and understanding of relationships and several articles on relationships written on content sites might have earned me this tag and I should admit that I am flattered by all this. I get mails from people whom I don’t even know confiding me about their problems and asking me for advice. Even my friends have always trusted me with their problems and issues whether it is marital or dating and hoped that I will have a solution for them. And fortunately I also have been able to come up with the right advice and counseling too. I have often wondered many times that what the qualities which makes relationship experts. I guess some of these qualities may be listening skills, analyzing things without being judgmental and experience with similar situations.

My belief is that when you have a problem the first place to look for an answer is within yourself. Also if anyone is behaving in a particular manner to you it is mostly because you have given them the reason to behave so. I am a firm believer of ‘what you give is what you get’. I am perfectly alright with my close friends coming with their problems to me. But after seeing some of my Articles based on the relationship issues of my friends I have complete strangers sending me mails asking for support or advice which makes me want to laugh. I sincerely think that such problems should be left to experts. However, through this blog i would be discussing some tips for building good relationships and dealing with problems.