Top 10 reasons why a Relationship may fail

Love is one of the most wonderful feelings a person can experience in his or her whole life. Love can make your world bright and beautiful and give a meaning to your life. Of course it is also true that when in love we tend to see only the good qualities in the partner and do not see the flaws which is probably the reason why many relationships fails. Even relationships which start so well can fail after a period of time.

So what can be some common causes or reasons why a love relationship may fail? Given below is a list of Top 10 reasons for failure of relationships.

So why do Relationships fail? There can be many reasons for a relationship failure. Some of the common causes or reasons are listed below.
1. Opting for the wrong Partner: This can be one major cause for a love relationship to fail. Physical compatibility or lust is not just enough for a relationship to survive but the couple should have a mental compatibility too. It is very important for one to know what he or she wants from the relationship and what the partner’s expectations from them are. You should know what to expect from a relationship and what not to. Many people expect life to be a bed of roses, but it is not always so. Being realistic with expectations can avoid disappointments and failure.
2. Lack of Understanding and Trust: Trust is an important ingredient which determines the success or failure of any relationship. I have personally come across many people who stalk or spy on their partners because of their lack of trust. If you are suspicious of your partner and not able to trust them there is no way your relationship will survive. Not only the relationship may go weaker and weaker but also you would be making yourself miserable with your worries and suspicions. Lack of Understanding and Trust is a major reason for break ups and failure of marriages.
3. Lack of Communication between Partners: Lack of communication between couples is another major cause why love relationships do not work. In fact communication is very essential to build trust and understanding between the couples to strengthen their bond. It is very important to spend quality time with the partner and be open. Honesty and transparency between couples can make a relationship strong.
4. Lack of Respect for the Partner: In a love relationship that you should respect your partner, their feelings and desires. Physical abuse, Verbal and non verbal bashing, excessively dominating nature etc are some things which happen when this respect does not exist between couples. This can be a major reason for relationship break ups.
5. Lack of Appreciation: It is very important for you to know that you value your partner and not take them for granted. Every individual desires a pat on the back or appreciation from their partners for their efforts. But the sad truth is that most couples take their partners for granted and not consider it a necessity to be appreciative of them. Even simple words of praise or encouragement can do wonders to a relationship.
6. Cheating on your Partner: Infidelity can be a major cause for the breaking up of a relationship. There can be many reasons why men cheat on their partners. But the most common reason is their quest for new sexual experiences. Out of the many reasons why women cheat the most common reason is the lack of attention from their own partners. Whatever the reasons may be cheating on the partners can ruin a relationship.
7. Lack of Flexibility: No one is perfect in this World. Flexibility and Adjustments are vital in any relationship if you want it to succeed. One should learn to adapt and accepts the flaws of the partner also along with the good qualities. A relationship is about compromise too where you may have to tolerate even some small bad habits or way of living of your partner. If you can’t do that you may not be able to save the relationship.
8. Entering into a Relationship for the Wrong Reasons: There are many people who get into relationships with wrong reasons or expectations. There are also people who maintain the wrong attitude. If you are looking for a long lasting relationship (especially marriage) you need to believe that your relationship is for keeps and not just for a few months or years. This mentality of permanency and desire to make a relationship a lasting one enables the individual to face and solve the difficulties that may arise in life and not give up on it.
9. Failure in maintaining the Attraction Levels: Those many relationships start well they end up stale as the time passes when boredom creeps in. Many individuals are seen taking their partners for granted once the initial honeymoon phase is over. One should know how to avoid boredom in marriage and keep the attraction levels high if you wish to maintain a happy relationship. Good Sex is an important part of a love relationship which can help one to keep the partner attracted and also stop the partner from being unfaithful. Majority of people who cheat on their partners are involved in sexless marriages or have an unsatisfied sexual relationship.
10. Financial Worries: Financial Worries can wreck even good relationships.
Apart from this sometimes friends, children or relatives could also be a reason for a relationship to become a failure. Also many times it is noticed that when a partner commits a mistake many individuals are unwilling to forgive it. Even when they say that they forgive they do not forgive fully and bring back the topic again when arguments happen. In fact building a good relationship is an uphill task which needs a lot of efforts and energy.

Image Courtesy : Alex Bellink @ Flickr

How to Avoid the On-Again-Off-Again Relationship Cycle

As a lesbian that has been in a monogamous relationship for the past four years, I want to bring up an issue that I’ve found to be disheartening and problematic: people that get stuck in this “on-again-off-again” relationship cycle. This happens to all types of relationships, but it seems as though this issue affects a LOT of lesbians. In addition, to being a huge bummer when “couple friends” of ours are having problems or breaking up, because we never want to see that, it also tends to leave my wife and I with far less to people to get together with. When the couple splits, usually both sides want to tell their story. We have taken a strictly neutral stance in those situations where we will listen but not take sides with either friend. I think because we don’t take a side, we are somewhat forgotten about by both sides and end up with less close friends altogether. I want to examine the cause these sorts of relationships. Why do people get stuck in these cycles of breaking up and getting back together? Why does this seem to be more prominent in the lesbian community? How can this be avoided?

I’ve read that people get stuck in these cycles for many different reasons. Sometimes everything is great except for one very important disagreement. Sometimes there is one great thing among several aspects that don’t work. The relationship could be unbalanced somehow or one person may be using the other. As with several cases that I have witnessed, one person isn’t sure what they want and keeps changing their mind. My first assumption about why lesbians tend to have this issue more frequently is that lesbian relationships contain far more emotion and drama than most. Women are typically thought of as letting their emotions play a big role in their lives. I’m not saying this is a bad thing; I myself am a woman. The problem, I think, is that the emotion is doubled in lesbian relationships. Doubled emotion means doubled drama and I can see how that can lead to an explosive situation when it comes to arguments or fights. Essentially, these women are breaking up at every argument over who-knows-what.

But why get back together? I think this, too, is the nature of women. We tend to want to be with another person. There is an innate desire to be close to someone and when we wake up or sober up the next day and realize we are alone, it doesn’t go over well. Being with that person was comforting and comfortable and so, they get back together. I have seen this happen many times and would like to offer some advice.

I know it is cliché but communication is the key in any relationship. Being open and honest about your feelings is a must. If you cannot do this with your partner then you are going to have a problem. Good communication for the most part will prevent major arguments from happening in the first place. Talk about what you want and where you see the relationship going. If you are both under the understanding that you are in it for the long run, arguments can happen without breaking up. If you have already broken up and want to get back together with an ex, take a break before doing this. A break from the relationship can give each person time to think and decide if getting back together is really the best option. On a break you are both still open for the chance to get back together so the panic of being alone isn’t enough to drive you back without considering the whole picture. Think long and hard about getting back together. I know it is lonely without them and you feel you have made a mistake but make sure to resolve the original issue before going back to them. If you broke up because they were too jealous or dishonest or whatever it may be, consider that this probably will not change and the cycle will continue. Do you want a few weeks of unhappiness to get over a break up or several wasted months or years of unhappiness being in this on-again-off-again cycle?

This is a Guest Post from Mandi Titus. She is a Blogger, Guest Blogger and Freelance Writer. She currently lives in New Smyrna Beach, FL and works in Public Relations for a large private health care organization. She maintains two blogs of her own @ Vermont and Mandi Munches and can be reached at mandititus@gmail.com You can also follow her on Twitter @ATVermont.

Improving Marriage by avoiding Relationships Boredom

Many Couples tend to ignore the relationship or take it for granted once the initial excitement is over resulting in boredom creeping in and couples falling apart. Boredom in Marriage can be a killer in the relationship and can even result in marital infidelity or divorce. If you really want to keep the relationship intact you need to conquer this boredom and save your relationship. After some time of marriage men and women tend to be less interested about their own appearance or intimacy with partner. This is because your priorities have shifted to work, the kids, money or something else.

If your marriage is turning sour and you do not want your partner to leave you one thing you should do is act before it is too late. Look for way ways to rediscover your feelings and bond with each other by introducing new dating ideas and spicing up the sex life. Adding romance to your relationship can help your marriage survive. Never reach the point where you are not touching each other. Also put in efforts to make yourself attractive and stay healthy.

Break away from being predictable and add a surprise element to the relationship. This reminds me of a friend’s father who takes his wife out to the restaurant nearby for dinner on their wedding anniversary. My friend and I thought that he would do something different on their 25^th anniversary. But nothing of that sort happened. Similarly one of my friends husband always gives her money whenever he has to give her a gift. Though my friend has no complaints about this and buys whatever she wants with the money I am sure she would have appreciated if her husband took the time out and personally picked up something for her. An unplanned date or an unexpected gift can be a sweet surprise for your spouse.

Sometimes being too possessive or clingy about the partner can spoil things between couples. Every individual needs space and by giving that to your partner you are also taking the time to miss each other’s company.  

Communication is very important for a healthy relationship. Keep the communication open. Be a good listener. It would help your partner to confide things to you.  Also by knowing your partners strengths fears and anxieties you gain a better understanding of your spouse and can be of assistance when they need your support. Make sure you and your partner sit down and talk on a daily basis even if it is for a 5 minutes. If you have had a disagreement or quarrel make sure you resolve things soon.

These are small things but can definitely help in building a better relationship and improving marriage. But remember, Relationships are a two way street and it takes the effort of both the partners to make it work well.

Related Article Links

Boredom in Relationships

Reasons for Infidelity in Relationships

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