Saturday, May 15, 2010

Reasons Why Going Back to an Ex may be the wrong choice

There are plenty of Articles and e-books all over the internet offering relationship advice on 'How to get your Ex back'. It may be tempting to get back to an ex because you are lonely or because you do not want to stay single, but getting back to an ex is not always the best decision. Majority of times this reconciliation with an ex only ends up with a bigger breakup and hurt later. After breakup a relationship requires more trust and care to make it work again. You cannot make someone to change or love you by force; it has to come from the heart of the person. If both the couples cannot wipe out the differences, improve yourself and work together in making a relationship better it is better not to get back with an ex. Many times, it is observed that a relationship is never the same again after a break up. Here are some reasons why Why Going Back to an Ex may be the wrong choice.

You broke up for a reason: You had problems with your relationship which did not work at the first place. It is tempting to go back remembering all the good things about the relationship and ignoring all the bad things and hurt or going back on the hope that your boyfriend or girlfriend would change. But if you have not fixed up the problems which has caused you to breakup I think it is foolishness to get back with your ex.

You need to move on: Time and Tides wait for no man.Believe that the break up happened because there is something better in store for you. Staying glued to your past would only cause you difficulty to move forward in life. Even though you have broken up with you ex you are still at an advantage. You have learned from your mistakes in the relationship and this experience can help you to make your next relationship better.

The relationship would never be the same again: Once the trust in a relationship is gone it is very difficult to re-establish it again. If it is infidelity of an ex, lying or addictions which has resulted you in parting would you be able to trust him or her completely again? Moreover, it is the human mentality to cause hurt to the person who has hurt you. Even if the person has changed and you got back with him or her because of that it is only natural to remind the person the reasons why you two spitted earlier during fights.

Life is too short to be wasting: Did you get back into the relationship hoping that your ex would change? Are you still in a miserable relationship hoping that some miracle would happen and then you would live happily ever after? You may see such things happen in Movies but they are far from reality. People do not change that fast. People can change their outward appearances or can pretend for some time. But unless the transformation has not happened from the heart they are bound to show their true colors soon. You do not need someone whom you need to change but someone whom you can accept as they are. So it is better to look elsewhere than trying to change your ex or stay in the relationship hoping that your boyfriend or girlfriend would change one day.

You could not keep him earlier: If your ex was the one who broke your trust and resulted in the breakup, what is the guarantee that he won't do it again? As the saying goes,' once a cheat, always a cheat'. It is observed that people whom you trust too much are the once who mostly break your trust. Also forgiving a person for infidelity or abuse can make a person think and take it for granted that you would forgive them again.

Breaking up or recovering from a break up completely can be a hard thing. But if you remove the old relationship clutter from your life, it is not hard either. Believe that you have a better life in store and that you would find someone who would treat you the way you deserved to be treated and whom you would not want to break up with. So, do not get back to an Ex because you deserve better.

This is my Article Published on EzineArticles.
http://EzineArticles.com/?expert=Anamika_S 

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