Sunday, April 18, 2010

Why should you get your ex back and why not to?

If you do a search on Google on Get your Ex back you can see thousands of articles and e-books written on the subject. But I have always wondered Why anyone should get an Ex back.  I see more reasons for NOT to get an Ex back than reasons for getting back to an Ex Boyfriend or Girlfriend back. If there are positive signs that Ex wants you back and you to want it maybe then it is okay.  But if you are the only one who want to get back and make the relationship work then probably it is a mistake to consider getting back with ex. Also remember that a relationship where breakup has happened needs a lot more work and efforts from the couples to make it work.

Why should you get your Ex back?  There can be right reasons and wrong reasons to get someone back to your life. Incidentally I have 2 friends who got back their partners for the wrong reasons only to break up later.  Some typical responses of women who get back their Ex for wrong Reasons are given below.

“He is my possession and he has to stay that way. How can I allow someone else to have what belongs to me?”
“He dumped me? How dare he? If anyone has to dump anyone it has to be me and not the other way round.”
“How dare he dump me? I will get him back and teach him a lesson that he would never forget in his life.”
“He is loaded with money. How can I let go of him that easily?”
“I cannot be without a boyfriend so I need to get him back.”
“I have no one else to go to. So he needs to have me back.”

However, there are many right reasons why someone may want to rekindle a broken relationship. Sometimes breakups happen in the heat of the moment or due to external factors and both the parties regret it later as that was not what they wanted to happen. In such cases do not allow pride to come in between and take steps to sort out the problems to get back together fast. If a relationship is valuable, rewarding and fulfilling to you and both of you love each other it may be worth saving the relationship and not letting it go without giving an effort to save it. Good relationships are based on love, trust, understanding, compromise and forgiveness. It makes sense to give your partner at least one chance to correct their mistake and set the relationship right. But if you are unsure and do not have your heart in a relationship or want to get back the ex for wrong reasons it is best to let it go by clearing the relationship clutter so that you can move on because it won’t stay for long and you may end up with a worse heart break.

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